Our life begins to function better, more efficiently once we begin to make our own choices. But we will continue to struggle, to live our lives in sorrow if we don’t want to change, to improve.
When it comes to children, most choices are made for them, the guardians thinking that it’s the best decision for growth. As a result, children have little or no say over the macro events of their lives, or what happens to them on a daily basis, and this is to be expected. But once this happens to adults, they feel that they’re being victimized.
To be able to choose one’s life decisions is the opposite of being a victim. The concept that is choice is extremely remarkable, and that most have the ability to make their own choices. What some forget, however, is that they have this freedom of choice, whether it be impulsive or reactive.
Being Responsible
Some find it extremely difficult to take responsibility for their failures, the pain that they’ve caused themselves or others, this based on the choices that they’ve made. As a result, they end up blaming their boss, spouse, parents, for all their misfortunes.
They acting out of ignorance doesn’t absolve them of the responsibility for they making a poor choice. Most will just plead ignorance once they make a bad decision, such as speeding over the limit, and then saying, “Officer, I didn’t know.”
A Victim Culture
What we live in is a victim culture. It’s usually, always, the other person’s fault that we fight, go to war, disagree, get into car accidents, lose money in the stock market, get a divorce.
What victim hood, placing blame on others, always does is it make us feel better, passing off responsibility thinking we’re in the right, but it also makes us helpless while perpetuating our problems.
Reversing The Process
So what is it that you want. A relationship without pain, a fulfilling life, a peaceful loving family without turmoil, success in your work. If you want any of these things, you need to stop thinking that you’re the victim.
Having the right to choose is taking the initiative to create exactly what you want, and not always settling for Option B, because Option A is too hard, too painful. Instead, take complete responsibility for all your outcomes.
There are universal laws in this world, such as the Law of Gravity, but there’s other laws which are just as powerful, one in particular focuses on helping those who choose, and bringing pain to those who feel are victims.
This natural human law dictates that: what goes up must come down, that what’s on the inside will always show up on the outside, that energy will follow attention, and what it is that you believe, you can achieve. If you don’t think you have a choice, then you don’t.
If you shove the responsibility for your choices and your outcomes outside of yourself, this law will attempt to teach you to take more responsibility, this by forcing you to repeat the lesson over and over again until you get it right.
Making Your Own Choices
What we have is the knowledge, freedom, and the technology to create the exact life that we want for ourselves. Most of the external social issues, such as crime, poverty, disease, violence, are the result of making poor choices. These social problems will persist as long as we believe we don’t have a choice.
Those who makes their own choices know what they want, and they know how to get it. They’re in charge of their lives, they take complete responsibility for whatever happens. Choosing takes confidence, risk, and effort, but anyone can do it.
Being the chooser means taking complete initiative for your outcomes. You’re in charge of creating what it is you want in your life. You don’t restrict yourself to who or what chooses you.
Often, we think we don’t have a choice. We’re unaware of our power to be able to choose, and the power our choices have. We make choices unconsciously, or on impulse.
The Power To Choose
Know That You Have A Choice
You’re never stuck, you always have a choice, even if you don’t know what they are yet. Never allow the lack of information or impulse to result in making a bad choice.
Realize Your Choices
Assume that there’s more choices than you’re aware of. Identify a few of them which are available to you, realizing you don’t always know what you don’t know. Identify the best choices and never settle for the unproductive ones.
Making The Best Choice
Compile all of the information and then make the best possible choice, this to get the exact outcome you want. Evaluate a choice that’s based more on the most likely long-term consequences of making that choice.
• Be Creative – Seek out new ideas and opportunities which are beyond the past and the present
• Take Calculated Risks – Accept failure and rejection and learn from them, treat them as a part of life, a lesson learned, never take it personally
• Become Assertive – Always ask, state, say what you want, and always directly say “no” to what you don’t want
• Be Proactive – Never just continue to react to events, or by habit, waiting for things to happen to you
• Set Goals – Clearly define your goals and then vigorously pursue them
• Assume Abundance – And never think scarcity. Believe that there’s always plenty of resources and opportunities. Think positive, anticipate success
Your life is the compilation, the sum result of all the right choices that you’ve made, both consciously and unconsciously. So once you begin to control the process, the right of choosing, then you take complete control of your life.